2025, for me, was a year of recovery. After suffering through a very toxic company and being unable to leave because of visa issues, I slowly rebuilt myself amidst the ruins.
Don’t Network
There is a slogan prevalent in modern society: “build your network,” as if so-called “networking” is something where more is always better. But in reality, it isn’t. Bad networking is definitely a liability. Compromising yourself and conforming to others just to “fit in” or “network” is a betrayal of the self. Your time, your energy, and your mental space are your most precious resources. Interacting for long periods with people you don’t internally respect is a form of continuous cognitive dissonance that significantly harms your physical and mental health.
You should be selective about your network. Even if there’s absolutely no one worth connecting with in a particular job, don’t force yourself to “network.” Truly valuable relationships are built on mutual attraction and appreciation. I think you’re great, you think I’m great; let’s exchange contact info and stay in touch. That’s it. That is the most original and essential form of “networking.”
The Banality of Evil
Have you ever wondered: why do many people, when complaining about their company, add things like “OOOXXX…, but he’s actually a nice person” or “he’s just doing his job”? So, why do so many “nice people” constitute a toxic, shitty company? Is the boss bad? Is the organization bad? Does everyone have their difficulties, and it’s the world’s fault?
Perhaps those “nice people” around you are the pillars of evil.
Evil doesn’t need a demon king; it just needs some mediocre nobodies to abandon their morality, stop thinking, and convince themselves that “I’m just doing my job” or “work is just like this.” That alone is enough to paint a picture of hell. Nice people are more destructive than bad people. Because you can expel bad people without hesitation, but what about nice people? How can you hurt a nice person? Many organizations are decomposed to nothing by these endless “nice people.”
Systemic evil often requires no malice, only obedience.
Believe in the Essence You See; There Is No Magic in This World
There is too much noise and too many lies in this era, especially now with AI added to the mix. There’s a saying that the cost of saying some BS is far lower than the cost of verifying that BS, so BS will continue to increase. In this environment, the ability to perceive essence—and even intuition—is far more important than ever before. Also, have the courage to believe in yourself. People often subconsciously believe what they want to believe or choose to conform easily, ignoring the intuition that has long been warning them, and the bloody reality deduced from the essence.
“No, you are all wrong.”
Embrace Emotions
Since when did having emotions become a sin? Suppressing and stigmatizing human emotions might be the most poisonous idea of modern times. Emotions are precious; they are protecting you. Anger points out what you care about; jealousy points out your desires; sadness is because a piece of your world is missing; anxiety is your lack of control over the unknown; fear is your biological instinct. Identify your emotions, embrace them, let them flow naturally, and then keep the useful parts. Let anger become energy, let jealousy become direction, let sadness teach you to cherish, let anxiety leave behind a meticulous plan, and let fear protect your life.
In a recent podcast, Ilya talked about emotions, saying he believes emotions might be a missing part of current LLMs. You can think of emotions as a highly compressed module, which could explain why humans have fewer “total tokens acquired” but learn more efficiently.
In this era of information overload, we need efficient sub-modules to filter information. Make good use of your emotions.
Anti-Ableism
Recently, things like “early morning runs,” “cold showers,” “meditation,” “mindfulness,” and “positive thinking” have become popular. I’ve tried them too, but later found they didn’t suit me. I don’t like the “self-improvement” or “self-optimization” trends popular in Silicon Valley; it’s almost like treating humans as machines with a few parameters. Everything about a person constitutes who they are. So-called good or bad is mostly measured based on social values. Prudence, arrogance, justice, jealousy, temperance, greed, fortitude, sloth, faith, hope, love, lies, anger, hatred—all of these belong to me. The complete, living me.
I don’t need experts to tell me how to live like myself.
Constantly Fight Against Entropy
Entropy is a fascinating concept. Entropy exists on almost every level: your daily life, your skills, your thinking, your mindset, your physical health. Life becomes autopilot without intentional management; skills become rusty without intentional practice; thinking becomes dull without constant exercise; mindset becomes vulgar without constant reinforcement; health becomes a lump of waste meat without constant maintenance. I don’t like the daily gym and cold shower routine, but you should have your own way of fighting entropy.
Organizations also have entropy. Observing an organization’s entropy is simple: just see if the organization is intentionally fighting it. Are they constantly challenging the market? Are they introducing new technologies? Are they seeking breakthroughs? Is there metabolism? If someone tells you, “The WLB here is great, we still have a lot of funding, our parent company is very rich,” then you should smell the scent of rot.
Without facing stimuli from the external environment, entropy will cause you to gradually rot. Humans to nature, experts to professional fields, companies to the public market, nations to the world.
Antifragility
This is a very interesting book. My career path is somewhat atypical: I have a bunch of independently developed products, and I also have the normal progression path in tech companies. In the past, people would ask, “What exactly do you want to do?” or “Just work hard.” That was until a cynical middle-aged man gave me a name: Antifragile. This is actually the Barbell Strategy in Antifragility: invest a small part of the cost you can afford to lose into high-risk ventures, and then use the majority of the cost to invest in low-risk ones. However, for me, this is even better than the Barbell Strategy: even if a product doesn’t make money, it remains my asset. It makes me unique, gives me a broader vision than others, and provides vast “skin in the game” experience, which is increasingly valued in modern software companies. So, what I lose is very limited.
The Green Lumber Theory in Antifragility also helped me a lot; it helped me demystify those “professional” software development methods. The way many companies develop is like nerds teaching birds how to fly. Project managers, progress management, agile masters, front-end, back-end, QA—these divisions and processes are entirely born for the expansion of large organizations. Making a product isn’t that complicated, especially now with AI.
Do you know how to eat when you’re in the army? Stand by the stool, place the stool, sit down, bowl on the left, chopsticks on the right, bring the bowl to your mouth, utensils must not make noise… If you think this is absurd, then modern so-called “cross-functional development teams” are the same.
FOPO
When I was at a low point, there was a quote I always liked: “Don’t care too much about what others say. Mediocre people spend a lot of time criticizing others, while they themselves achieve nothing in their lives.” I don’t want to be that kind of person, nor do I want to hang out with them. If someone always talks about other people’s affairs during a meal instead of their own discoveries, achievements, ideas, or lives, then I probably won’t be close friends with that person.
You Can No Longer Expect to Have a Mentor
Yes, kid. Most people who want to teach you something can’t teach you anything; they just want to enjoy the superiority of being a mentor. People who can truly teach you something won’t teach you because they know that for what comes next, you have to learn it yourself.
Technically, you should stay close to the modern era; in thinking, you should learn from the ancients. Many ancients saw things very clearly.
Win-Win Negotiation
This is something I have always insisted on, and it’s a good habit I think should be maintained. Play positive-sum games and negotiate win-win deals. Don’t play zero-sum games; that’s just a waste of life. Don’t do deals where only one side wins; that’s called plunder, and plunder brings hatred.
Can You Die at Any Time, in Any Place, for Any Reason, Without Any Regrets?
While attending Comiket at the end of the year, I suddenly had a realization: “It’s so good to be able to live as the person I want to be.” This is the most peaceful moment I’ve felt so far, and I’m sharing it with you who have finished reading this article :)
“It’s so good to be able to live as the person I want to be.”